ED & Sexual Frustration: How To Solve It

Satisfying Sex with ED: Advice for Sexually Frustrated Couples

In Erectile Dysfunction, Sex by user

Erectile Dysfunction. It can rear its ugly head at the most inconvenient moments. When it does, you feel defeated. Depleted. Depressed. You wonder if you can ever have satisfying sex when struggling with the shame and embarrassment of erectile dysfunction.

However, just because you’re living with ED, it doesn’t mean you can’t have sex anymore. In fact, there are many ways to successfully have sex with ED. In fact, not only will we discuss that, but also uncover the root causes of ED, how you can treat it, and how to have sex even when you can’t maintain an erection.

What Causes ED?

While many diseases and disorders are caused by physiological factors, with erectile dysfunction, both physical and mental components come into play. Here are the main physical and emotional causes of ED. 

Physical

You already know that you get an erection when you have sexual stimuli (like your partner’s touch or porn), but do you know how your body gets and maintains one?

When you get an erection, the blood vessels in your penis open up, which allows blood to fill up the arteries. The blood pressure increases; the result is a full erection that lasts during sex.

Because an erection involves the cardiovascular system, any health problems can indirectly affect the quality of erections you get. So if you have issues such as heart disease, diabetes, high cholesterol, or alcoholism, they may cause you to have ED.

Emotional

Your emotional well-being can play a major part in erectile dysfunction as well. If you have mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety, those can already affect your sex drive. Intrusive thoughts from those conditions can also cause you to have troubles achieving and maintaining an erection.

Even everyday stress can cause you to have ED at times. For instance, if you have a big project on a tight deadline at work or if you’ve been fighting with your partner often, it can make it harder to get an erection.

Make Lifestyle Changes

If you’ve been having ED, consider making some changes to the way you lead your life before resorting to medications. Not only can it lead to more successful attempts at sex, but it can also make you feel better, both physically and mentally.

Here are a few things you can try to see if your erections improve.

Get Rid of Unhealthy Habits

Life can be stressful, so naturally, we look for ways to let look and relax. Habits you can develop include smoking, drinking, and illicit drugs.

While these habits may temporarily reduce stress and improve your mood, they have detrimental long-term effects. All three habits can affect your cardiovascular system, which can then decrease the quality of your erections.

If you can’t quit these things cold turkey, try tapering. You may see a difference in your sex life by reducing your vices.

Start Exercising

Being overweight can cause erectile dysfunction, as it’s related to your heart health. If you don’t exercise, you should start now. If you already do some form of exercise, then you need to either make it more routine or have longer gym sessions.

With physical activity, there are no negatives, only positives to gain in your life. Not only will you lose weight, but you’ll also gain muscle and strengthen your heart.

All this can aid in overcoming ED and also help you last longer in bed. You’ll also be more capable of doing positions you couldn’t before, so it’s a win-win all around!

Change Your Diet

For those of us who are always on-the-go, we’re guilty of grabbing fast food on a regular basis. Even if you’re at a healthy weight, you can be “skinny fat.” You may look relatively healthy on the outside, but on the inside, it’s a different story.

Switch up your diet so you’re eating healthier foods. Do meal prep on the weekend with your partner; it can be a good bonding experience and it’ll save you money too. When you cook your own food, you’re more in control of the ingredients, so you can consciously make healthier choices.

By swapping junk food for hearty meals, you’ll feel a difference in your body. Not only will you feel full for longer, but you’ll also feel energized.

See a Therapist

If you’re already healthy and physically fit, then your problem with ED may come from the emotional side. Do you feel like your ED is caused by sexual performance anxiety or any other mental health issues? Then it might be a good idea to schedule an appointment with a therapist.

Even if you feel like you’re coping with life’s stresses well, talking with a therapist is always a good idea. They can teach you valuable skills to deal with stressors in life so you’re better equipped to handle them when they arise.

From a mental health standpoint, going to therapy sessions can also help you get to the root of what’s causing your ED. Once you find the cause and get healthy ways to address it, you might see an improvement in your sex life.

How to Have Sex with ED

If you’ve already tried all the above or want to improve your sex life immediately, here are some tips on having sex with ED.

Seek Supplements That Treat ED

You may have heard about the “blue pill” that treats ED; although it’s highly successful, it’s also expensive, so you may have crossed supplements off your list.

But now that technology’s made leaps and bounds, there are more alternatives out there that are effective and more affordable. With access to treatment you can regularly buy, you’ll see your sex life improve without the addition of financial strain.

Be Intimate Through Touch

All too often, we equate intimacy with sex. Yes, sex is intimate, but that’s not the only way to feel close with your partner.

The majority of people live hectic lifestyles, which can inadvertently cause a disconnect with our spouses. When was the last time you took some time to fully focus on an activity with your wife? Even if it was recent, how many times was it interrupted by a ringing phone or text alerts?

Fulfill your need for intimacy by planning a romantic night together with no distractions. Be clear that there’s no expectation for sex so there’s no pressure.

Instead, you can lie in bed, cuddling and reexploring each other’s bodies without being sexual. You’d be surprised at how satisfying it is to do this.

Sex Doesn’t Mean Just Penetrative Sex

When you think of the word “sex,” you probably associate it with penis-in-vagina (PIV) sex, or anal sex (for gay couples). But there are lots more sexual activities you can enjoy with one another without requiring your penis penetrating your partner.

At times when you’re struggling to maintain an erection, it’s a great idea to turn to oral sex instead. You can satisfy your partner by performing fellatio or cunnilingus; during that, you can try and see if you can get an erection going. They can return the favor and perform fellatio on you so you get sexual stimulation, even if you aren’t erect.

Your partner can also stimulate you with their hands. An erection isn’t required for male orgasm, so both you and your spouse can get sexual satisfaction without having penetrative sex.

Incorporate Sex Toys

Sex toys can spice any bedroom up, whether you have ED or not. If your partner absolutely has to have penetrative sex, you can look into getting a penis sleeve. When using one for intercourse, it can feel similar to the real thing.

You can also look for prostate massagers, dildos, or vibrators, all of which can be used on both of you. Take a look at an online sex store to see what’s available to you; it can be a fun experience that brings you and your spouse closer.

Improve Your Sex Life

Just because you have erectile dysfunction doesn’t mean your sex life has to come to a screeching halt. As you can see, there are many ways to have sex with ED. Not only can you make lifestyle changes to help the dysfunction, but you can also find alternatives to penetrative sex so both you and your partner are still sexually satisfied.

By combining medical treatment, lifestyle changes, and creative ways to get sexual satisfaction, you can keep your sex life strong and rewarding for all parties involved.

Want to solve your problems of erectile dysfunction but too embarrassed to go to your doctor? Join Alpha Club now and you can do your doctor’s visit virtually, all online. Plus, we’ll discreetly ship your ED meds right to your doorstep.

Click here to join Alpha Club right now while this offer lasts >>